I've done...terrible things.

So here’s a thing I didn’t know.

Dana Snyder, the man who gives his voice to the character of Master Shake on Aqua Teen Hunger Force, is here at the Supanova convention.  That part I did know, so don’t go walking away, clapping your hands, satisfied at learning that little bit of information.  He attended the Melbourne one as well, but we didn’t have a lot of interaction, just solemn nods from across the room.

I ran into Snyder and the some of the Aqua crew down in the hotel lobby around noon today as I was on my way to hunt for sustenance in Brisbane’s revoltingly muggy atmosphere.  Seeing them waiting for the elevator, I joined with them to go in search of foods upon which to feast.

Okay, now here’s the thing that I learned:

Dana Snyder is not just the perfect person to play Master Shake, he’s THE person to play him.  For the entire walk Snyder was going off on a Shake-style rant about Australia and who knows what else, and it was funny.  Funny, up until we sat down to eat.

Nobody else seemed upset by Snyder’s refusal to STOP talking in the character of Master Shake, so I figured they were just a pretty tight, very creative group who were always working up new material (A thing I could certainly understand, seeing the unhappy faces of visitors to my social group who have no clue what we’re going on about).  Over the course of the meal, the thing that I realized was that Snyder wasn’t playing Master Shake, he thought he really was Master Shake.

And that’s when I got scared.

It turns out Snyder was a homeless man that Aqua Teen’s creators had to walk past on the streets while dreaming up the show.  Not unlike Jello Biafra extending a humanitarian hand to Wesley Willis, giving him the opportunity to be the rock star he always knew he was, The Aqua guys pulled the filthy, clearly mad Snyder from his ratshit-caked tent put him in the recording booth where his natural talent punched through his calamitous stench.  Master Shake was born, and for that we’re all thankful.

But the guy’s fucking insane, and I was terrified to be sitting next to him where once I was thrilled to be hanging with what I thought was a comedy genius.  He’d go from doing a hilarious bit of “Shakey” dialogue, with the other guys madly writing it all down for later use, to punching the kebabs on our plates with his enormous fists, smashing plate and all, screaming at the top of his lungs in foreign tongues.  From that he’d just start crying, a broken thing slumping in his chair.  I marveled at how nobody else was phased by this, this thing which must be commonplace to them, but what to me was like trying to enjoy a relaxing meal next to a hulking Chuck E Cheese robot programmed by a lunatic child.

It was a thing of awe and dreadful panic, and I’m lucky to have choked down enough of my meal before the plate and everything on it was obliterated by another barrage of those awful, pounding fists.

Pick up some Aqua Teen dvd’s by the way.  Good stuff.  Carl’s the best.

Tonight’s the opening ceremony thing for the Brisbane Supanova, so I’ve got to head off to that in a few minutes.  If you’re planning on showing up, please bring a rocket pack because I am dying to go home and get back to my game consoles, and maybe my work.  Sure.

Anyhow, I’ll write a bit more after this thing tonight.  Exciting?