How could I forget? MORE STUFF!

On the Jellyfist front, Professor J.R. Goldbergiford designed some lovely shirts and an amazing poster from that magnum opus, and they’re now in the wild, just waiting for someone to love them – someone like…you?  

God, that was beautiful.

Don’t worry, I will walk you through this:

• Bear Shock Shirt

It’s labeled as “Bear Shock”, probably just to make this guy more palatable, but in reality it’s the “I’m fucking you” bear from Jellyfist, a character who has broken away from societal moorings, proclaiming that he is indeed “fucking you” while clutching his melting ice cream cone in one tense, spasming hand, wet dairy splashing luridly about his person.  How does the cone not break?  Is it all an act?  You could lose yourself for years dealing with these heady questions.  Now your torso can lose itself as well.

 

• Ghosties Shirt

The “Ghosties” shirt is different from most other shirts dealing with the occult that you’d find on the streets.  No, the extra mile was taken in the manufacture of this fine, quality product  in that the tee is actually HAUNTED.  You put this shirt on and you’re wearing a whole crapload of unrestful spirits on your very mortal coil, guys.  9 out of ten wearers of this shirt go mad and drive their cars into graveyards.  They don’t die so much as gently park their car, get out, sit as though they’re having tea with their phantoms, and then start dancing, calling over to you to join in the festivities with the beings that you cannot see at all.  It’s pretty embarrassing to watch and it’s best to just call the police, really.

 

• Baby Beehead Poster

Showed this one before on the Mindspill, but now it’s a physical thing you can own.  There’s no prize for doing so, but spotting all the references to other cultural icons like “ALIEN bee” will make you feel proud of yourself for wasting your life in such a specific way.  Though you can’t really tell from the preview image, this poster includes some of my greatest work, as I drew one of the bees, and it is a horrible bee.  It is the “45 year old Golderberg” bee, projecting J.R. into a future of baggy eyed sorrow and weariness, the miserable, draining effects of a thankless life showing on every feature of her BEING.  Pretty fuckin’ cool, huh?  I think so, too.