These Question Sleep Skull shirts went up on the TopatoCo store this past week and just in time for some of you guys who I threw acid on and ruined all your nice shirts. These are nice shirts, and maybe they’re even acid proof (they are not acid proof).
Comes in two colors and will keep you safe from all harm (no). I have no idea why one shirt is a quarter more than the other, but that maybe makes it more special, or maybe you wear one for more casual events and then the more expensive grey on grey one to those fancy cotillions you go to.
Holy shit! They said the day would never come but I didn’t believe them? Remember how I kept telling you I didn’t believe them and you thought I was crazy to have hope in my heart when everyone was giving up and laughing at me? Well who’s laughing now, buddy?
Noodlecon shirts are available for everyone now, and not just the people who bought them at the San Diego Comicon! I know! It’s impossible, right? WRONG! I can prove it to you! Just throw some money at Slave Labor Graphics and they’ll fire one at you, straight through your wall and into your face.
No, this is not a dream. This is really happening.
Oh my god, I can’t even keep talking about this. I’m going to go eat a bowl of these delicious shirts because wearing them isn’t enough. This shirt has to travel THROUGH me.
Every dollar you spend on these shirts goes straight to my pants. Okay, it goes to buying pants because I’m not wearing any pants and it’s not pretty.
Still on the fence as to whether or not you should get the new Noodlecon 2012 shirt for you and your loved ones? That makes us here at Question Sleep incredibly angry, but we’re also very understanding and want to know you’re a hundred percent confident in your money-wasting decisions…
SO LET US HELP YOU!
What better way to see just how much you need this shirt than to show you how much people who already own the shirt are enjoying that very shirt and having their lives changed in ways they could only dream of before joining this exclusive club comprised of everyone else on the planet except for your indecisive self!
Shirt subjects #001 and #002 responding properly to new Noodle shirts.
Those look like happy customers to us! It was important that they pay because, even though they were helping us in our research, how can we study the effects on customers if our test subjects weren’t doing everything customers do? They were great sports about it and any guilt we might’ve had just vanished at the sight of the wonderful looks on their faces at being some of the very first people to wear the shirt.
Looking good, guys!
Day 2 and subject #001 isn’t feeling well, spends a great deal of this day sitting in the park trying to work out just what is happening to her. Subject #002 exhibits a less physical response but is clearly impaired psychologically. When we caught up with him he was furiously berating beans in a grocery store.
Day 3. SUCCESS! We think the case for why these shirts are so amazing is made clear, and if you’re not running for your credit cards then we don’t think the proof exists that’d top what we’ve already laid out for you!
Now we don’t want to go too in depth about the science behind how this modern marvel works, but here’s a quick computer simulation to help demonstrate the basic operation. It should be obvious that the more people who wear the shirt, the more power is drained out of their bodies and channeled towards a more deserving parasite/beneficiary. WHAT’RE YOU WAITING FOR?!
The shirts will be available this month from Slave Labor Graphics!
That special noodle time is upon us again when Happy Noodle Boy fans across the world, from land, air or sea, gather under a urine-soaked freeway overpass and celebrate Noodle Boy in the only way they know how – URINATING!
This time we’ve learned our lesson, thanks to your complaints in previous years, and we’ve made the commemorative shirts wearable by human beings instead of just snakes and pigeons! That’s right, if you’re a person now you can get in on the shirt-wearing action.
This shirt has four holes for your body to stick out from!
The fine folks at Slave Labor Graphics have generously volunteered their fruit rollup machine to print up these excellent, slightly sticky t-shirts for all you NoodleCon attendees to purchase and wear while fighting off ants and fruit-snack loving children.
Can’t attend NoodleCon 2012? You’re a goddamned asshole! Whatever your reasons, there’s always the San Diego Comicon where the shirts will also be available at the Slave Labor Graphics booth #1815. I’ll even be there to sign the shirts so long as you stand at least ten feet away from me while I’m doing so. Can’t make it to even that? No worries, you’ll be able to find the shirts available on SLG’s online store shortly after comicon has come and gone. We’ll let you know when!
That’s right! We got THAT guy, and that other mushy one!